Election Coin Toss Just a Complete Embarrassment

Democracy is a hell of a thing and sometimes an election comes down to an actual coin flip because life’s too short to not get very weird from time to time. That was the case in suburban Chicago this week when a village trustee race was decided by chance.

Cook County Clerk Karen Yarbrough was tasked with the ceremony. The names of Gary Bell and Beth Zupon were placed into a bowl. Bell’s was drawn. He called tails and were off.

And folks, it pains me to report that Yarbrough was not up for the job.

Yes, technically, she flipped the coin. But in the pantheon of important tossers, her name will go down as one of the more disappointing.

Tails came up, giving Bell the victory. Zupon’s dreams were crushed.

One wouldn’t blame her for taking the loss extra hard wondering what a reasonable amount of revolutions could have meant for the final outcome. To have one’s soul crushed in such a petering and in glorious fashion is a gut punch.

Sure, this is probably an overreaction. But if we’re going to allow coin flips to determine our representation in government, we should insist that these 50-50 toss-ups are conducted to the highest of standards. Maybe get some former Super Bowl referees to travel the country giving free clinics.

Considering the stakes, maybe not the worst idea.