Please Don't Make a 'Happy Gilmore' Sequel

Adam Sandler and Christopher McDonald appeared together on this morning's Dan Patrick Show and discussion dog-legged naturally to the idea of a Happy Gilmore sequel, an idea that's been floating around since people left theaters in 1996 after seeing the original.

The Sandman and his on-screen antagonist each expressed interest in the idea, although Sandler revealed no actual off-line conversations have taken place in regards to putting these two on the Senior Tour, shaking the jar, and seeing what happens.

And that's an important caveat because these interviews tend to get warped and twisted in translation to the point where, surely, there are thousands of people now anticipating Happy Gilmore 2 to hit theaters next summer.

Not to take away anyone's hope and joy, but I do think it's worth considering if a Happy Gilmore sequel is all that great of an idea. Yes, anything Sandler does is enjoyable. Did you see Hubie Halloween? It was all a slightly buzzed person could ever ask for. A few big laughs. Unabashed dumbness. And that was without beloved characters. So Happy Gilmore: Too Gilmore or whatever should be every bit as good as the original, right?

Not so fast. Gilmore was a success for so many reasons but among the primary is the perfect timeline in which it appears. It's the quintessential 1996 movie. The references are pristine, a frozen-in-amber encapsulation of pop culture at the time.

Bob Barker. Verne Lundquist. A non-problematic Subway spokesperson. Golf as a sport seeped with old, stodgy people. To watch it is to be transported back to a specific time, a nostalgic safe zone that all the Happy Madison movies were able to create.

Messing with perfection is not without risk. A lumpy, cloyingly desperate Gilmore reboot would do more harm than good. I personally am uninterested in what happened to the title character or care what he's doing in 2021 because he exists, permanently, in the one specific fictional world revolving around him.

Seeing him adapt to the times or grapple with new ideas is not an appealing endeavor. Sometimes the better part of valor is discretion and being able to leave well enough alone. Sequels of beloved comedies tend to be like candy. There's an intense rush of euphoria at the outset but then things get sluggish. By the end you're not sure why everyone involved bit off that much.

It would be a damn shame if they were to add to the world but pollute it with an inferior product. Nothing wrong with going out on a singular high note.